You were wrong about one thing. I never would… I never could despise you.
see also: 101 ways to say “I love you” without actually saying those three words.
ugh, so much love for this scene. I find Matthew’s words so bittersweet. “I never would… I never could despise you.” Oh Matthew, you had to hit rock bottom to be able to realize this. I wonder if Series 1 Matthew would have been so quick to look past this. Pre-war Matthew, whose world was black and white, who had put Mary on a pedestal and who had idealized their romance, would surely have needed more time to process this. And that time would have given way to doubt, would have fractured Mary’s self esteem, and possibly injured their relationship significantly. But it took the Great War, the prospect of a debilitating paralysis, struggling with his conviction to honor an engagement to another woman in the face of his unresolved feelings for Mary, and the resulting fallout for him to change his perception of reality.
“Say something, if it’s only goodbye.” Oh my darling Mary, your undying love for this man speaks loudest when all that matters to you is his opinion of you. You were worried that you weren’t good enough for Matthew when he first proposed. Six years later, after everything you selflessly and quietly did for Matthew through the war, you still fear that this one thing will eclipse it all, and that if he knew, he would be lost to you forever.
I love that even when the conversation changes to the subject of Bates’ impending sentence, Matthew brings it back to Mary. He stops walking and stands back, forcing her to turn around and face him, to hear him tell her that her worst fears were unfounded. Her broken and grateful smile when she hears those words…
